July is noted for fireworks and that's one reason my mind has turned to that topic for this month's blog topic. The second reason, this topic is similar to a message my pastor preached a couple Sundays ago: "When is it OK to Blow Your Stack?" With that said I want to poses another question: "Who's Minding your Mind?"
First things first. For those of you who have never heard the phrase "blow your stack," let me
define what it means: mainly AMERICAN, INFORMAL...If you blow your stack, you become very angry with someone and shout at them. EXAMPLE: "My father really blows his stack when I break something or wreck the car." Got the point? With that said, I have another question for you...Have you ever had someone push you to that place where you WANTED to "blow Your stack"? I am certainly guilty.
There is one thing of which I am sure: At one time or another you have encountered a boss, a spouse, a co-worker, or child, that made you want to "blow you stack." How did you handle that moment? As a former Behavior Modification Counselor, I would advise you to take the following steps:
1: Stay calm:. If you're so PO'd ( ticked-off) that you can't trust yourself to be calm, go away and come back when you can be. Be aware of the time and place and recognize when the place or time is just not right for a blowout!
2: Attack the problem, not the person; When you criticize or attack someone personally, you risk burning a bridge you may need later. Focus on the real issues at hand.
3: Be open and honest: The second you grit your teeth, cross your arms, and close your mind, you give in to stubborn childish behavior. But if you remain open and keep your wits about you, you'll manage to do the right thing in a tough situation.
4: Don't lose perspective: Most times it's not about you. It's a problem the other person has. Don't make it yours.
5: Try to be empathetic: Put yourself in the other person's shoes and try to understand his or her perspective. If you can't do that, or you're not sure what it is, ask. Your assumptions may be wrong.
6: Take the high road: Taking the high road doesn't mean staying quiet when something needs to be said. It means saying it at a time and place and in a manner that's reasonable and respectful of all present. If you kick yourself afterward, you probably didn't do it right.
7: Don't go at it in public: If you do, be prepared to apologize in public. most people really do not like to be publicly eviscerated. Would you? Then find a way to "LET IT GO!"
Let me tell you a secret, when we learn to try and please God instead of people, we also learn control and that may mean "locking your lips." So let's explore the topic from a spiritual posture. That takes me back to WHAT WOULD JESUS DO? (WWJD). At this point I will borrow some tips from my pastor's sermon:
Learning NOT to "blow your stack" begins with learning how to show mercy and forgive in the same way our heavenly Father deals with us. Because we, as Christians, are forgiven persons, we should also be forgiving persons.
When we confront injustices out of anger and bitterness, our deep hurt and that unspoken desire to get even, and we take action to make them pay for what they did to us, we do not display the righteous life God desires of us.
From this, I will make this closing conclusion: "When is it OK to BLOW YOUR STACK? NEVER! Think about this, a violet battle is raging around us twenty-four hours a day, it's the battle for our minds. That battle is vicious, intense, unrelenting and unfair. Why because Satan is the origin of battles in our mind, because he knows our mind is our greatest asset and when it is broken we can't hear God nor connect with Him. Isn't it better to comfort rather than to have confrontations?
The battle for sin always starts in the mind, and we must take every thought captive to obey Christ. Your mind doesn't always mind. It can be rebellious. It delights in going in a different direction. When I want to get to God, it wants to satisfy the flesh: When I want to pray, my mind thoughts want to float away.
As Children of God we are to avoid "blowing our stack" at all cost and put on mercy, kindness, humbleness, meekness, and longsuffering. That is WHAT JESUS WOULD DO! Let the Fireworks be in the fields, not from your mouth. HAPPY JULY!!!!!!
TO GOD BE ALL THE GLORY!
Elaine J. Jones